Yankees vs Red Sox Again? Make it Stop!

Make it Stop! Oh, the Humanity!
Make it Stop! Oh, the Humanity!

BOSTON, MA – This last Yankees vs Red Sox
series got thinking. I know it’s supposed to be a big series. I know we’re supposed to get excited about these historical nemeses matching up again.  Nothing says baseball quite like Yanks vs Sox, right? The epic showdowns over the last century, the biggest stars in the game, the intensity and leaving it all out on the field every pitch, every inning between these two teams.  The sale of Babe Ruth to the Yankees almost 100 years ago spawned “The Curse”and held the pathetic Sox hostage to it, denying them a World Championship until 2004. The players and characters who’ve always competed in these games from The Babe, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Berra. Jimmy Foxx, Ted Williams, Dom DiMaggio, Yaz.  All the way up to Jeter, and Mariano. Big Papi, Manny being Manny and Boggs, et al. So I sat down this past Sunday evening to watch the resumption of this classic series, and it occurred to me: The YANKEES and RED SOX! NOT AGAIN, for chrissake! These guys are on Sunday Night BaseballAGAIN!” UGH!

Where was ESPN 75 years ago?
Where was ESPN 75 years ago?

I get that ESPN probably has ratings that support the notion of nationally televising every single game between these team. But you know what? ESPN is flat wrong, and they and the other TV outlets are conspiring to ruin the game of Baseball for generations to come. People getting jacked up about the World Cup? I get it. Baseball is “Not like it Oughta Be” any more. Bombers vs Boston is no longer a rivalry. These games are atrocious! Boring? Check. Repetitive? Check. Like watching paint dry? You bet. And worst of all? 5 hours long! Holy Cow! The whole Moneyball craze is slowly destroying the game I love. Tell me the last time a night game between these two teams ended before 1:00 AM.  Tell me the last time hitters in these games went up looking to jump on a first pitch fastball. Doesn’t happen.  Every single at-bat is a war of attrition between strikeout prone hitters and watered-down, mediocre pitchers locked in epic battles to… take pitches down the middle, foul off a million pitches out of the strike zone, and routinely turn singular ABs into 45 minute stare-downs, leaving us scratching our detached retinas out.

I watched Chase Whitley (I think I remember a class trip once to the Chase Whitley) throw 28 pitches to Mookie Betts (hate the BS that he was named for Blaylock and not our legendary Wilson) who straight out of AA was quickly assimilated into the Yanks/Sawx “way” by drawing out every at-bat… the way the veterans do it.

Enough! Just Enough already! This is not a Rivalry! It is 18 regular season games of torture, where 2 bad teams try to scratch across a run once in a while, as we idiots sit and watch the brutality with toothpicks propping our eyelids A Clockwork Orange-style.  These teams, who’ve given us truly great baseball and memorable and historic games for decades, now suck. They now conspire against us to play bad, boring baseball. There is no longer any reason to “showcase” these teams. The strategy of wearing down the starting pitchers to get to the soft underbellies of weak bullpens is no longer viable. Pitching has made a comeback.  There are few truly bad relievers these days-even the Mets ‘pen has improved dramatically. For the love of Tanyon Sturtze, show some fire!


I need a break from the tedium. From the mediocrity. From the Television Networks insisting that these series still “have it.”  Now, where is that North Korean Futbol Team I’ve grown so fond of in the Word Cup?

Okay… Let’s change gears with?
Deep Thoughts with Fake Sandy:
Frank Cashen passed away this week at 88. The Architect of the last (only?) great Mets era. He worked tirelessly with Nelson Doubleday to give New York a team we could rally around.
-My Aunt Rose passed away on Tuesday morning down in Boca Raton. She was 101.  Her mom (my Grandmother) lived to 100. FSA will be around for a while it seems.
-And congratulations to the freshly-minted bridegroom to be, so small now that he should from hence be referred to as “Theoretical Matt.”

Tune in tomorrow for another kick-f’ng-ass Meet The Matts Radio segment.

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About Fake Sandy Alderson 175 Articles
Big Al Sternberg/Fake Sandy Alderson is from a not-so-nice part of Queens. But through grit and elbow-grease finds himself living on Long Island with his bride and twin 12-year-old sons. He is a sports encyclopedia... and a loose cannon. In fact, Michael Baron of Metsblog.com blocked him on Twitter. You can find The Blocked One's Tweets here: @AldersonFake