NEW YORK, NY – For the rare NY Jets and New York Yankees fan, like Johnny Rox, yesterday was a bad day. For fans of the Giants and and Mets, like our Founding Matts, yesterday was a grand day. Why? Because we couldn’t help but think that today’s NY headlines could read something like this: Giants Ground Jets, Mets Better Than Yanks...
The Yankee fans out there will likely scoff, as their Royal Family Entitlement Gene makes it impossible for them to think about their Bombers being “the other team” in NYC baseball. But even a Grapefruit League game in March tells a different story. One of their guys, Curtis Granderson, banged out two hits and the Metsie’s big gun, Yo-Cesp, did just enough to forge a 4-4 tie. Need more proof? The Grandy Man gave the kind of lip service that Derek Jeter used to giggle through after any games against the Boys From Flushing, “They’ve got a great organization, a great team. I enjoyed my four years over there. I looked forward to seeing them today… [Tee hee].”
Face it Yankee Fans, your team is loaded with crappy and old players. It’s going to be a long year… made longer by the Art being created on the Shea Park canvas, night in and night out. Remember, George Thomas Seaver called pitching his art form.
And there was also the great relief/news that the words “elbow” and “Thor” were not about Noah Syndergaard needing Tommy John surgery. It was just a classic Mets blunder-in-the-waiting; an article about what Nord God is doing to avoid having that now common-as-a-haircut surgery. And while this is clearly jinx material, we let out a collective, “Phew!” and breathed easier… for now.
But let’s get to the gridiron, where The New York Football Giants fired unanswered ground-to-air missiles at their Friedrich Air Conditioner Stadium (Angry Ward trademark) tenants, the J-E-T-S. First, Big Blue usurped any ground gained by Gang Green in football superiority by landing some big name free agents, Janoris Jenkins, Olivier Vernon, Damon Harrison and bringing back Jason Pierre-Paul and Victor Cruz. Meanwhile, while taking a beating on both flanks and being pounded, ironically, by the Giants offensive, the Jets signed Matt Forte to play quarterback. Oh, wait… He’s a running back. [Guffaw].
Did we even mention the positives of Climate Warming (compromise of Global Warming and Climate Change)? 82 degrees in Newark. In March. Hell, the Mets and Yanks could play the next one at the Newark Bears ballpark.
All in all, it was a great day for Mets and Giants fans, while those of the New York Jets and New York Yankees had this headline smacking them in their downed heads: Giants Ground Jets, Mets Better Than Yanks.
That’s it for now, please comment below and comeback tomorrow for Hubit Chakockov. You can find us on Twitter and Facebook at @MeetTheMatts and Meet The Matts, respectively.