NEW YORK, NY – Sorry for being tardy today with the our headline post; Different Matt has been out gallivanting again and is MIA. In his words, “Oh sh!t, I forgot!” But no worries, Mop-Up Matt is here to entertain and provoke thought. Well, he’s also got Charles Oakley, LeSean McCoy and Jacob deGrom to help with those tasks.
Charles Oakley: Following up Buddy Diaz’s stuff about the Knicks yesterday, let’s check in with one of their all-time greats. Ol’ Chuck is sure managing to stay relevant, isn’t he? The guy made over 46 million in a stellar NBA career, yet gets arrested for taking a $100 chip off the table as he realized his bet was nothing but an air-ball. This comes after he was infamously escorted from the court for too many personal fouls on Madison Square Garden Security, precipitating him being banned from MSG. Why is excessive gambling the thing that seems to be at the top of the Retirement Activity List for pro athletes? He now faces a 1-6 year sentence. Yet whether he’s in Knickerbocker orange & blue or prison pinstripes, you gotta love Oak.
LeSean McCoy: The above makes Oakley’s troubles seem as significant as the birth of an ant. Sorry Mr. & Mrs. Ant… And it makes the nickname “Shady” so perfectly apropos. This is tragic stuff, and if the real McCoy proves to complicit in this whole ugly incident, it will just be another sock in the nose for poor slob Bills fans like DJ Eberle and buffalobilly84. Throw in the Buffalo Billions scandal, and Western New York is now in dire need of some love.
Jacob deGrom’s Hell: Speaking of poor slobs in need of some love, Shakin, Jake has to be pining for a trade anywhere. Playing for the Mets is beyond a sentence in Purgatory for this guy. IT IS HELL. Oy vey, enough already! This team has nothing, no assets other than him and Thor, and arguably the worst owners in professional sports. Do I want to see him go, HELL NO, but keeping him here is tantamount to Pontius Pilate sending Jesus off to his demise. deGrom’s sentence: No Mercy. You will remain in Flushing.
That’s it for now, please feel free to comment below and come back tomorrow for a man living in the black hole that is Buffalo, Junoir Blaber.
