Big Ben Tuesday: Bad Start for New York Football, Pats are Worst Franchise Ever

The Worst

A SWAMP IN NJ Sooooooo, who’s ready for some Daniel Jones? It was a rough weekend for the New York football teams. The Jets blew a heart-breaker and the Giants just blew. On the other hand, the New England Patriots looked unbeatable and oh-by-the-way, added one of the best receivers in the league, albeit under some shady circumstances. Is there any doubt now that the Pats have far surpassed any other franchise in the history of sports on the Hate-ability Meter with this latest in a long line of middle finger moves? I’ll explore that, and dabble into the what went wrong for the home teams.

The Worst

Worst Franchise Ever

Some Mets fans will disagree, but in their heart of hearts, I believe many would have to come clean. The Pats won their first Super Bowl by cheating, got a slap on the wrist, and were off and running. The league made a big bonfire for Bellichick’s practice porn videos from around the league and the league’s integrity burned with them. From there, it’s been a parade of deflated balls, bent rules, and rub ‘n tugs, with more “gates” than Winterfell.

The coach is an annoying scumbag who won’t even tell you who is calling the plays and lists all injured players as “questionable.” The QB is a whiny little pretty boy with thin skin and the voice of a teenager in mid-puberty, who doesn’t eat tomatoes because of inflammation. He won’t get on a plane with his super secret personal trainer steroid provider. God, they’re terrible.

The Worst

I’m not going to say the Antonio Brown thing was orchestrated from the start, but the Patriots did offer the Steelers a number one pick for him. The Steelers wisely refused to trade him to the Patriots and he ended up in Oakland. When things started to turn sour in Oakland (likely right around the time AB got a look at Gruden’s coaching skills and Carr’s arm), the Pats saw their opportunity. It’s likely the Pats put out some feelers to say, “if you can get out of there, we might be interested.” So AB went so nuts that even T.O. was all “damn son,” they had to let him go. (Note: the above Raiders joke was obviously made before the game last night.)

You might think it’s a stretch, but there might be precedent. When accused of behaving badly on the Steelers in order to get released because he knew the Pats would take him back, LaGarrette Blount didn’t deny it.

The Worst

Now the Pats get Brown at a discount and didn’t even have to give up a first round pick for him. Yeah, that’s fair. Why Goodell didn’t step in and stop this travesty is beyond my pay grade.

Any Other Contenders?

What other franchise even comes close to their level of scum? Sure, the Cowboys have an equally creepy, rub ‘n tug loving owner, and a massively unlikable player in Zeke. F him and his imaginary spoon! The Cowboys also would sign Jeffrey Epstein and Brock Turner if they thought they could rush the passer. Too soon? This team is the clear #2. But they haven’t cheated or won lately, so they’re a distant second.

The Worst. Well, ok this one is adorable.

Are the Yankees even that unlikable anymore? The Dodgers and Red Sox consistently outspend them. They haven’t landed the top free agent in years. The manager’s job is stable. Face it, this is not your father’s Yankees of the George years.

There’s nothing particularly unlikable about most of the players, except maybe Chapman. But they have Aaron Judge, who is like a humongous fun man-god. Sure, they could get rid of the antiquated facial hair policy, but there’s not much else to winch about these days.

NY Giants

They do know they can put someone in the middle of the field, right? It seems like they haven’t been able to cover slot receivers/tight ends for decades. Jaysus, Dak looked like Flash Gordon out there, the greatest Jets QB of all time. Hey, any Giants’ GM, it’s okay to draft a linebacker before the 6th round. Dan Duggan, the reporter who covers the Giants for The Athletic, has often said things like this throughout pre-season, “the Giants appear to be high on Tae Davis, but those of us watching practices can’t figure out why.” Settle in, Giants fans, this defense might be bad.

Let’s not drag this out Shurmur

Eli looked alright but there are always those three or four plays where if he had just a normal amount of athleticism, they would have picked up a first down. It’s frustrating to watch.

Is there a chance that the Cowboys are really good and the Giants aren’t that bad? Yeah, I doubt it too. The Giants tried a tandem at CB opposite Jenkins with Antonio Hamilton and Deandre Baker. Neither had played much in the pre-season and they were exposed.

Hamilton was the guy missing tackles and getting tossed aside by Randall Cobb on a key third down. Said Pat Shurmur after the game, “I don’t get it, he was really sticking to Benny Fowler in practice.” Baker was the guy getting burned deep by Amari Cooper and Michael Gallup.

Jets

The Browns game next Monday looks a little less formidable now, but it’s already close to a must win. After the prime time tilt with a pissed-off Browns team, the Jets play: @Pats, @ Philly, Cowboys, Patriots. As my dog Chief likes to say “rough.” If they lose to Cleveland, they might staring at 0-6.

In Memoriam

This weekend marked the death of the season of the New York Mets (sorry deGrom can’t pitch every night), Boston Red Sox, NY Giants, and NY Jets. The poor folks in Boston will have to wait until February for the next championship parade. In New York, our only hope might be the Yankees. Get on board, they’re not that bad anymore.

Come back tomorrow for Angry Ward, whose Vikings figured out the formula for success. Don’t let Cousins throw it more than ten times. Follow us on Twitter at @BenWhit8, @MeetTheMatts, @Matt_McCarthy00, Instagram @MeetTheMatts and like our Facebook page, Meet The Matts.

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About Ben Whitney 438 Articles
Ben Whitney comes from journalistic stock. Aside from his brothers, rumor has that his great-great grandfather was the youngest brother of Eli Whitney and covered the earliest "rounders" games. Big Ben is also another New York Rugby Club player/pal of Different Matt, Short Matt and Junoir Blaber. He likes film noir discussions, has twin girls and took up ice hockey after retiring from rugby.