MARGARITAVILLE, USA – For those of you who’ve been away on a “darkness retreat,” we lost singer-songwriter Jimmy Buffett this Labor Day Weekend. While I wouldn’t identify myself as one of his devout Parrotheads, it’s hard not to like a guy who wrote songs about sailing and drinking and eating cheeseburgers. I mean, c’mon, how can you not like THAT? Anyway, in his memory, here’s my ham-fisted tribute.
Drinkin’ a bourbon, watching the Mets turn
Another sure win into a loss
My cell it keeps dingin’, Vogelbach ain’t swingin’
Effing Short Matt is one hell of a boss
Wastin’ away again in Meet-The-Matts-a-ville
Searchin’ for some fun sports sh!t to blog
Some people claim that there’s some anger to blame
But I know, it’s Management’s slog
Not to switch gears, but I’ve been here for years
Nothin’ to show but a bad attitude
Kirk’s still a Viking, and that’s not to my liking
I’d up and quit but don’t want to be rude
Wastin’ away again in Meet-The-Matts-a-ville
Searchin’ for my next Kyrie to bash
Some people claim that there’s a doctor to blame
But I know, it’s Management’s trash
The Yankees stopped losing, so I started boozing
NFL games are just one night away
Cancelled my cable, got snacks on the table
With my 3-buck antenna I can still watch ’em play
Wastin’ away again in Meet-The-Matts-a-ville
Searchin’ for some Dallas Cowboys to dis
Some people claim that there’s a bald guy to blame
And I know, it probably is
Yes, and some people claim that there’s a bald guy to blame
And I’m sure, it totally is
Time to cruise on out of here. Come back tomorrow MTM’s resident Disco King, Buddy Diaz!