BRONX, NY – If you had told us on the first day of Spring Training, when Alex Rodriguez and his overly insincere smile/apology walked through the gates at Steinbrenner Field, or when Sandy Alderson and his cache of broken promises walked through those at Tradition Field, that both teams would be in first place in August, we would’ve:
A: Waited for you to giggle – so we could giggle with you.
OR
B: Ducked for cover when you didn’t, thinking you were some loon with a gun.
But alas, he we are. Both teams in first place and seemingly hitting their stride. And what’s even crazier is that A-Rod and Sandy are front and center in their respective squad’s success. As Mel Allen would say, “How about that?!”
In Port St. Lucie, the much-anticipated returns of Captain David Wright and Dark Knight Matt Harvey, the Marvel hurler (see what we did there?), allowed for a giddiness that veiled another dismal off-season of non-impact moves by GM Sandy Alderson: We cite Mike Cuddyer as evidence. Heck, they even moved in the fences and tinkered with CitiField for the 6th conecutive year since its opening. But Wheeler blew a tire, Wright went down an hour into the season and all seemed lost as Granderson and Cruds hit more like Mendoza than Musial.
On Florida’s left coast, meanwhile, Yankee camp was a mess. Albatross Al was giving Bomber brass douche chills as the oozing rash that no salve could make go away. And CC Sabaithia (ck spelling), Mark Teixiera (ck spelling), Brian McCann and Carlos Belt-tron were fighting Father Time and comparisons to young, thriving facsimiles of themselves. And all that Brian Cashman did was add Stephen Drew and bring back Chris Young. Oh, and Derek Jeter, the rudder through the rockiest of Bronx waters, was home sifting through his super-model attaché. But here we are; the Yankees and Mets in first place.
How about that?
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P.s… Stephen Wright will be throwing out the first pitch for the Red Sox tonight.
