NFL Giddy as Eli Manning Shuts Up Critics, MLB Vomits Up Mets vs Nats

Eli Manning, Mets, Nationals, NFL, MLB, George_Bush, Meet_The_Matts

Eli Manning, Mets, Nationals, NFL, MLB, George_Bush, Meet_The_Matts

HOUSTON, TX – Aside from the near comical heat and humidity (think Airplane), Houston is a darned-good sports town.  you can stay in a hotel downtown, and pretty much walk to all the major stadiums. The baseball team has had a resurgence since jumping to the Beer Softball League that is the AL, and the Rockets have played entertaining basketball in the pre-Carmelo Anthony ERA. The town also boasts the freak of nature that is JJ Watt, who is as close to Lawrence Taylor as someone that can completely influence a game from the defensive side of the ball. But more on that later. Since we’re late to publish today (MIA DJ Eberle is rumored to be on a Hunter S Thompson-esque binge after his Bills vanquished Angry Ward’s Vikings), so let’s get to today’s topics and headline: NFL Giddy as Eli Manning Shuts Up Critics, MLB Vomits Up Mets vs Nats...

DEFENDING ELI: With a to-date downright offensive offensive line tasked with neutralizing the frothing and aforementioned Watt, it took a near perfect game by an embattled Eli Manning to overcome one of the better performances by a defensive player in a very long time. Watt was all over the place. But so too was his counter-part on the Jints defensive front, a guy named Kerry Wynn. On the offense, Odell Beckham played like a star with 109 receiving yards and Saquon Barkley became the first Giant ever to exceed 100 yards from scrimmage in his first three career games. But it all came down to Manning, who had his 2nd best day as a pro, percentage-wise, when the team needed it most. This was despite JJ Watt in his underwear all day. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Grinding Ax Walter Hynes.

And don’t think for a minute that Roger Goodell and the NFL brass aren’t tickled pink that the team from Houston is 0-3, rather than the team from NYC. Yes, Houston is a nice little sports town, but it ain’t the Big Apple.

Pete Rose, Meet_The_Matts
NOT Eli in underwear! But Charlie Hustle never jogged, Bryce!


Just blocks away from NFL HQ, the big wigs at MLB Central had to be barfing over the product on display in Washington betwixt the Mets and Nats. The only good thing that came of this debacle was that the umpires allowed the game to be played in constant rain; it wasn’t worth dragging the tarp out. FIFTEEN WALKS, 9 BB issued by Nats’ hurlers (we were all hurling) and 6 free passes from the NY arms. Thirteen different players toed the rubber… in NINE INNINGS. But you know what got my goat – and Gary Cohen’s – the most? Bryce Harper dogging it to first when he hits a fly. EVERY TIME. How great will it be to see him doing that in the Bronx next year?! Please, Baseball Gods, make that happen! Oh, and it’s “next year” for the Stanks, as Didi is DoneDone after being a Dumb-Dumb, with a head-first slide at home.

That’s all for now, please feel free to opine below and come back tomorrow for Battlin’ Ben Whitney, who likes analyzing flatulence.


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About Matt McCarthy 377 Articles
Matt McCarthy, is the MTM founder and consequently wears many hats: Director, Editor, Writer, Web guy and Podcaster... Also known as Short Matt, he's also a two-bit actor, voice-over pro, rugby, baseball and ice hockey player and likes hazelnut coffee with rice milk, while strolling in the sand, listening to foreign films... Matt also moonlights on MTM spin-off,, often wearing a wig and glasses while butchering a Kiwi accent.