Lawrence Taylor, Kyrie Capitulation, Passing The Buck, Frank Gore…

NEW YORK, NY – With that thing that sounds like a Godzilla foe, Omicron, testing our collective COVID-weary will to comply, we still have sports stories to keep us semi-distracted. [Knock on wood]. For this pundit – and new recipient of the Pfizer booster – today’s eye-catchers Lawrence Taylor, Kyrie Capitulation, Passing The Buck, Frank Gore and Trevor. Let’s have at them.

Lawrence Taylor

The most electrifying football player that I have ever had the pleasure of watching week in and week out, is in trouble… again. The real LT pleaded guilty to prostitution and having sex with a 16-yearold back in 2010. As a result, he is supposed to let the fuzz know when he moves. He was arrested yesterday for not doing so. Here’s a quote from his lawyer:

“Lawrence Taylor has been compliant with all of the rules and regulations regarding his legal status for the past decade. Sadly he is in the middle of a divorce and his local police department suggested it would be best if he slept at a nearby hotel. Mr. Taylor was constantly a resident of the marital home where he was registered, but on advice of local law enforcement he was sleeping outside the home. We are confident that this will be dismissed at the first court hearing.”

If he gets jail time, will Taylor sack his attorney? [Ba. Doom. Cha] Finally, it’s ironic that the first three letters of Taylor’s first name spell out LAW. Just sayin’…

Kyrie CapitulationThe Brooklyn Nets have apparently done an about-face re Kyrie Iriving, during a spike in virus stuff that now sees professional sports getting hammered again globally – just look at the European pro rugby circuit, along with the NFL, NHL and NBA. You’ll recall that Mr. Irving refuses to get a COVID shot, which makes him ineligible to play in NY or California. Unsubstantiated rumors suggest K-Ving (TM) won’t get vaccinated until Steve Nash publicly acknowledges that the world is flat. Anywho… Is this Kyrie Capitulation “evolved thinking” or just a “whore move” by Nets’ suits? If nothing else, their timing is worse than a Polish comedian’s. (Call me for the audio version).

Passing The Buck I absolutely HATE the idea of Buck Showalter managing the Mets. Talk about failing up! In 20 Major League Baseball seasons as a manager, he had a record over .500 TEN TIMES. Other than that, he was under .500. His career average is a mediocre .506. Aside from being a task-master that grates quickly on veterans – see his tenure with the Diamondbacks – Showsie is the MOST OVERRATED MANAGER EVER. To top it off, his last two years in Baltimore went from bad to awful. .463 to .290. Why the f*ck is old, dictator douche with 115 losses in 162 tries as the last entry on his resume even being considered?! Oh, and he’s been out of a managing gig since 2018. #FckBck

Frank Gore

Quick… who is the the 3rd leading rusher in NFL history? No, it’s not Hubit Chakockoff. If you guessed Franklin Gore Sr., here’s to you! Fab But get this, Gore, who was released by the Jets in the off-season, is making his boxing debut tonight against retired NBA player Deron Williams before the Jake Paul-Tyron Woodley fight. He’s also tossing around putting the pads on after the fight for a contender. Frank is proving that 38 is the new 28.

Trevor

Today will see some familiar faces gather togehter to say goodbye to Trevor Herrick. Just typing that stings. He was Dude and Replacement Matt for us from day one on Meet The Matts. More than that, though, he was a husband, father, son, brother and friend. 51 years young and criminally gone too soon. Miss you, Trev.

We end on a downer, however, as Replacement Matt would be all over me if we did! So watch the below clip, comment below and come back tomorrow for a man that collects used cleats, Grinding Ax Walt.

Go to the 25 second mark