Angry Ward Wednesday: A-Rodg, Mike McCarthy, Sean Payton and Other Entertaining NFL Subplots

NEW YORK, NY – It’s Wednesday and the Northeast is once again back in the deep freeze but, who cares? Boy howdy, have these NFL playoffs been a barrel of laughs so far. I mean, as has been pointed out here and everywhere else the past few days, the games have been highly entertaining. But there’s all sorts of interesting subplots going on off the field. Let’s take a look at some of it.

Aaron Rodgers. Here’s the part where I tell you that I’m a Vikings fan, so it’s in my DNA to despise the Packers. I took special delight in them securing home field advantage and then promptly pissing it away in the snow, to a team from California. That was restaurant-quality schadenfreude right there. At the center of it all, as always, was Aaron Rodgers. I’m not going to talk about the BS from earlier this season, because I know where that gets us. But let me just say that I’m worn out on Aaron Rodgers, and now we start a whole new cycle of “what will he do now?” I personally hope he just f**ks off and retires, but we know that ain’t happening. He enjoys the attention too much. He loves the passive aggressive shots at his front office for not giving him enough help, while in the same breath saying he’s playing with the best receiver in the league and having a great time. Is he a great quarterback? Yep. Is he always in the MVP conversation? Pretty much. But, aside from his one Super Bowl appearance and win—over a decade ago—he’s been a postseason flop. He did win that Super Bowl with Mike McCarthy as his head coach, so he gets major extra credit for that. Otherwise, his act has gone terribly stale. But, speaking of Mike McCarthy…

Chris Christie, MeetTheMatts.comMike McCarthy. The Bill de Blasio of NFL coaches is still head coach of the Cowboys, and that pleases me to no end. Like de Blasio, McCarthy sucks at time management and just about everything else, but he’s white and won a Super Bowl, so he’s gainfully employed. But, for how long? Which brings us to…

Sean Payton. Apparently one year without Drew Brees is enough for Sean Payton in New Orleans. He’s outta there! Shocking that he doesn’t see much of a future with Jameis Winston, Taysom Hill, and Trevor Siemian to choose from at quarterback. You just know Jerry Jones wants to bring him to Dallas and pay some hired goons to take Not-So-Magic Mike on a long car ride. Anyway, yet another job opening! Hopefully more than a few teams finally hire a coach of color and stop recycling inept white guys. As we segue to…

Ben McAdoo. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you your new offensive coordinator for the Carolina Panthers. LOL. Enjoy! What, Adam Gase wasn’t available? You just know Matt Nagy’s phone is gonna ring any day now.

Buffalo. I can’t tell you how sorry I am that the Buffalo Bills and their fans have to go through such agonizing losses. There should be only one Minnesota Vikings in the league, but the Bill’s are Minny’s totally screwed brother from a Western New York mother. There should really be a cap on this sort of torment. Fitting that both the Vikes and Bills are based in snowy gulags. Watching these two teams play is like watching Fargo over and over and over. At least the Bills didn’t put a roof on their stadium.

I wanted to talk about some other stuff (Giants coaching vacancy, Carson Wentz, and maybe even Bonds, Clemens, Schilling and Sosa being left out of the HOF) but I’m over 600 words and out of time.

Come back tomorrow for Buddy Diaz, who is a lock as a first ballot inductee into the Obscure Sports Blog Hall of Fame.

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About Angry Ward 655 Articles
Angry Ward, who has admirers at the New York Times, is the quintessential angry sports fan but for one exception... he's flat-out funny. And the angrier he gets, the more amusing his work becomes. Psychiatrists say, "Angry Ward's 'anger' is a direct result of "Bronx/Mets syndrome: growing up in the Bronx as a Mets fan." As if that weren't enough, his Minnesota North Stars abandoned him for Dallas, forcing him to embrace The Wild the way Nancy Pelosi embraces Mitch McConnell at charity events. And while his Vikings only tease him with success, his Golden State Warriors actually win these days. A-Dubya is MTM's longest-tenured indentured servant, its Larry David and quite simply, "The Franchise." (Junoir Blaber disputes this). Vent, curse and giggle with him on Angry Ward Wednesdays.