NEW YORK, NY – Now that baseball season has ended… Wait. What’s that, you say? The season doesn’t end when the Mets hit the links?! Humph. Alrighty then. Indeed, it is the MLB Playoffs, and despite the sour taste left in the mouth from David Wright Money Grab Night (see Angry Ward’s perfect piece) , this pundit is still a baseball junkie. So, who to root for?
New York Yankees – There are two chances yours truly would root for the Stanks; Slim and None... and Slim’s on the golf course. Instead, I’ll be sticking needles in an effigy of Alex Rodiguez’s PED Ghost, rooting for a Bosox Sweep.
Los Angles Dodgers – They left NYC in the middle of the night. The adopting of their blue by the Mets in 1962 left psychological scars that CAN’T HEAL because Brooklyn Dodgers fan Fred Wilpon built a shrine to the girl that left him, Jackie Robinson Rotunda at Metsbetts Field. F’ the Dodgers.
Colorado Rockies – They are Bill Chadwick’s favorite team, as his call of “Shoot the puck, Barry!” still echoes through the halls of Madison Round Garden. For those of you that don’t recall, the Rockies traded Beck to the Rangers for 75 players, including: Pat Hickey, Lucien DeBluois (ck spelling), Mike McEwen and Bobby Sheehan? This is all from memory as I’m out the door for another funeral, so screw you if the names aren’t all correct.
Atlanta Braves – I’d almost rather root for the Stinkees. Almost. F’ the Braves… and Tom Glavine.
Boston Red Sox – They’ve won enough. Great team. Like the players. Best chowda in the world. But enough is enough. It’s time to let someone else win.
Houston Astros – You got yours. You’ll need another 40 years to get another. Sorry, it’s the Mets orange in your DNA.
Cleveland Indians – The Tribe may not have the horses take it all, but it’d be okay if they did. Go Chief Wahoo! Until somebody starts listing the leprechaun with his fists in the air at Notre Dame or Boston Garden, all the mascot stuff needs to go away. And really, I like the little drunk mick.
This brings us to our pick.
Milwaukee Brewers: How can not root for a team named for the making of beer?! And their female mascot has a mustache! Brewers or Bust!!! Hopefully, they’ll be playing the Indians, so somebody will win for the first time.
That’s it for now, comment below and come back tomorrow for a man that could dive into a pile of nipples and come out sucking his thumb, Junoir Blaber.